Knowing What's Important (finding, having, and getting it, too!)

It might just be a revelation, it may just bring a smile to your face.
Here's another very simple and profound process that just might change your day – or your life.

It's all about values – and the intersection with opportunity.  It's our values that determine how motivated we are to make a certain choice or change a certain behavior.  After all, how often do you procrastinate doing something you absolutely love when it's time to do it?  That's not such a problem, is it?

It's our values that establish our criteria for choice.  These values, along with opportunity, that largely determine our choice of friends, mates, careers, vacations, everything we do, in fact.

So it could be quite interesting to review and perhaps discover newly some of your values, your criteria for choice.  And to notice where you may have a criteria in place that is actually inappropriate and may be blocking you from having what you value.  Anytime you notice "perfect" creeping into your criteria, it's a good warning sign that you need to review those criteria.

It may help to illuminate why something you think you should be doing just doesn't get done, and something else does – and consistently, too!

This little language exercise is also a fun and interesting way to start a conversation.  I found it especially useful in my single days. With a little practice it can also seem like mind reading, and it's a powerful way to build rapport.   All this in a few questions?  Well, actually, yes.  That's NLP at it's most interesting.

Quick Hierarchy of Criteria (and a tip of the NLPCO hat to Charles Faulkner for this version)
A Simple Hierarchy of Criteria Elicitation
1. Pick an innocuous object on your person. It could be a watch, a ring, your shoes, even the shirt you are wearing.
2. Ask yourself, "What do I like about this?" Starting at the bottom of a blank piece of paper, write down all of the words and/or phrases you use along the bottom allowing some space between each one. These words are criteria.
3.Taking each of the previous criteria words or phrases in turn ask, "ʻWhat is important about _________ ?" Your answers will be higher criteria of the previous one. There may be one or several of them. Write down each one of them above the previous criteria and on the same level with each other.. Connect the previous criteria with these new ones with lines.
4. Recycle through step 3 until you have no higher level Criteria. This can noticed by the repetition of higher level criteria or just finding there isn't anything higher.
You could just write these questions on a post it and take it with you to lunch or a coffee break.  It's also fun to have an acquaintance participate, either as note taker, or to ask about their values.

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Cheers,
Tom Dotz

PS:  Summer Programs are upon us!  Thinking this is the summer for you?

A few of our students at last summer's programs got so excited about what was being accomplished already in the trainings they did some interviews of their fellow students.  We've posted some here and we'll be adding more.